


My Lady Merlin

by thethingthathasnoname



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-22
Updated: 2015-07-21
Packaged: 2018-04-05 15:24:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4184916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thethingthathasnoname/pseuds/thethingthathasnoname
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin is forced to become a girl in order to save Camelot (surprise, suprise). However, what will ensue when Prince Arthur Pendragon meets this beautiful, strangely familiar female character? Cheeky bit of Merthur for you all. Enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“WHAT?!” Merlin screeched loud enough to disturb the entire castle.

“Merlin…” Gaius sighed. “Come on… It’s the only option…”

“I refuse to turn myself into a girl… even if it is to save Camelot!” Merlin exclaimed desperately.

Gaius looked at him with his wise, withering gaze.

“No, Gaius! I will not! I won’t do it! I refuse! Nope! Not a chance! Not at all!... No!”

* * *

 

An hour later, Merlin found himself standing in his shabby chambers draped in one of Gwen’s old dresses. He stared at his reflection in the darkening window.

His hair was still ebony black but it was long and flowing, stretching a good length down his back to his waist. His face was slightly more rounded and his ears had shrunk. His lips were plumper and more poised, holding the grace of a girl as opposed to a scruffy, young lad. He was shorter, he realised, when he tried to reach up to close the shutters and failed. He had also lost the bean-pole figure, and had instead grown hips and a tightened waist.

He knew that Gaius was trying his best not to laugh. Merlin turned round to glare at the old man and watched as the glimmer of a chuckle in his eyes immediately vanished at the murderous intensity of the opposing blue ones. They were the only thing that had stayed the same, Merlin realised, once he had turned back to the window. He allowed himself one last glance before turning to leave.

Well… he took one step, and promptly staggered.

“How on Earth do girls walk in these ridiculous dresses?” Merlin gasped. “I feel like I’m being sucked inside out. Ugh! It’s so uncomfortable; I can’t breathe! Surely, this can’t be right.”

Unable to contain himself any longer, Gaius smirked and muttered “Just wait until you try the shoes.”

Merlin glared at him, but the anger soon subsided and the pair fell about laughing. The whole situation was just too ridiculous to get cross about.

With an eye-roll, Merlin shoved his feet into the dainty heels that Gaius had… borrowed… from the servants’ hall down stairs.

“How do I look?” Merlin asked tauntingly.

“Beautiful, my lady.” Gaius teased. “You’re all set. You had better get going, the banquet will be beginning soon and you don’t want to draw attention to yourself by being late.”

“Yes, mother.” Merlin groaned.

“Just because you’re a girl, doesn’t mean I am too!” Gaius protested and Merlin just stuck his tongue out. However, Gaius’ face settled into a more serious expression and he added “Be careful, Merlin. Remember, keep out of sight as much as possible, just try and blend in. Don’t talk to Gwen or Arthur or anyone who might recognise you. Keep your head down and follow the lead of all the other women. Oh and try and do something about your voice.”

“Ok…” Merlin coughed, concentrated for a minute, and then continued in a higher pitched, slightly strained tone. “Ok. See you later, Gaius.”

“On second thoughts, maybe just don’t speak too much at all.” Gaius blinked. “Do you know what it is you need to do?”

“Stay out of sight, blend in, be inconspicuous, don’t speak too much. And somewhere along the way try and identify the sorcerer among all the other normal peasant women at this stupid women’s banquet. I still don’t know why I couldn’t have just served at it.”

“Because you wouldn’t have been allowed to stay in the room long enough to find out who it is. You wouldn’t have been allowed to talk to anyone. You know no males are allowed at the ladies banquet.”

“Arthur’s going!” Merlin protested.

“Arthur doesn’t count. Now get going or you’ll be late!” Gaius hurried Merlin out the door, who was swaying and tripping with every other step. “And for Camelot’s sake, sort out your posture and walk normally!”

“I’m trying the best I can!” Merlin called back.

“Good luck, Merlin.” Gaius nodded, before Merlin left through the door to their chambers and hurried down the corridor.

It was incredibly awkward, scurrying along in these heels. He hadn’t really anticipated the loss of his long legs, or the fact that these stupid little shoes on his feet would slow him down this much. He also hadn’t considered that this stupid dress sucked in his flesh so that he could barely breathe.

By the time he made it to the banquet hall, he was flushed and out of breath. He tried to join the crowd of waiting women who had come from towns all over the Camelot realms. Thankfully, there was a lot of newcomers so he didn’t stand out too much as being the only one that no one knew, but his general gangly and awkward appearance didn’t do much to help him fit in. He shuffled his way to the back of the crowd and tried to keep his head down.

Right, time to remember why he was here and actually try and identify this sorcerer... or sorceress, he supposed. He looked around. Everyone seemed to be chatting away, smiling and laughing and talking. They were all so elegant and so careful in their movements; it was really quite impressive. Especially now that Merlin knew everything they had to go through with the clothes and the shoes and everything. For the first time in his life, he thanked the stars that he was a boy.

Someone suddenly bumped his shoulder.

“I’m so sorry,” he instinctively apologised, spinning around to face the person.

“My apologies, my lady.” Came the deep, strong voice that Merlin knew only too well.

Merlin’s eyes travelled up from where they resided at a lower level than usual, and immediately wished he hadn’t done so.

Prince Arthur stood there, his eyes full of concern for the unknown young woman whom he had just barged so rudely.

Merlin nearly yelped and dipped his head again, dropping into a curtsy. He held himself there while mumbling “My lord.” How the hell was he going to get out of this? This was definitely not being subtle. This was one of the few things he was told not to do! He couldn’t look up again; Arthur would surely recognise him.

“My good lady, there is no need for such courtesy when I am the one who was so impolite in the first place.” Arthur apologised from the depth of his heart. “Won’t you look up, and let me know that you are not hurt.” He pressed, anxious that he should not have caused harm.

“I’m fine, sire.” Merlin protested meekly, forcing his voice into that painful falsetto again.

“Then why will you not look up?”

“It would be improper, your majesty.” Merlin was floundering and began shuffling away, still bowed.

Arthur reached out on instinct to stop her from escaping. His hand closed around her elbow.

A shock of electricity passed between the pair. It was like the skin where they touched was on fire and the rest of the world ceased to exist.

With a jolt, Merlin’s head jolted up.

Arthur gasped.

Merlin blushed and tore himself from his grip, realising his mistake.

Had he realised? He couldn’t possibly? But he had gasped!

A guard nearby coughed and Merlin realised that all the other women had already entered. With a start, he dashed in after them, not daring to look back.

Arthur was struck dumb. Who was this stunning maiden who had fled from him and resisted him? She was surely beautiful and yet she insisted on hiding her face. Why? Why did she seem to think it would be improper? Perhaps it is because this ladies’ banquet is meant to be celebrating the individuality of women and it would therefore not be proper to engage with men during it? But Arthur wanted to know more about this girl. He felt like he knew her. He felt like she was familiar to him. But certainly he would remember a girl like that. When he had touched her, the feeling was euphoric. It was incredible. He knew he needed to see her again. And yet, she hadn’t even told him her name.

With a deep sigh, the prince entered the banquet hall and settled in his place at the head.


	2. Chapter 2

The banquet was nice. The food was nice. The conversation was uneventful but nice. Merlin had absolutely no idea who this sorceress was, but she didn’t seem to be causing any harm, yet.

However, the connection between Merlin and Arthur was… intense. Merlin knew he shouldn’t. He knew it was the last thing he should be doing. But he couldn’t help stealing glances at Arthur the whole way through the feast. Mainly, because most of the time, Arthur was watching him right back. It was addictive. This connection. This dance. This feeling. He knew it was wrong. He knew tomorrow it would all have to go back to normal. But just for tonight, he couldn’t help himself.

Arthur watched the mysterious girl, transfixed. She didn’t seem to quite fit in with the other women. She talked with them and laughed with them but she didn’t quite appear focused on them. Her eyes kept roaming; lost in some beautiful fantasy or the other. She really was stunning, he decided. It wasn’t the ordinary beauty either; of perfection and poise and grace. It was a raw beauty, a real beauty. The sort of beauty that you can only get by not trying to be beautiful. It was a beauty in the way she smiled, as opposed to the beauty of the lips themselves. It was a beauty in the way that her eyes glittered and sparked, as opposed to the beauty in the physical orbs. It was a beauty in the way she moved when she spoke, or laughed with a tremor, it was a true beauty in the way that she owned the room, and meant nothing could tear Arthur’s eyes away for more than a few minutes.

‘This is ridiculous’ Merlin decided half way through the evening. Not a single woman appeared out of place, and Arthur was watching him like a hawk. Not that Merlin didn’t like Arthur watching him. I mean, not that he did like it either. Well, he sort of did. But he didn’t. I mean, he couldn’t. Could he? Anyway, it meant that he couldn’t do anything without Arthur seeing. So really, it was quite annoying. But it _was_ kind of nice, you know? Gah! This was stupid, it probably didn’t mean anything anyway.

Merlin sighed.

This whole procedure had been an absolute waste of time. And would cause serious questions from Arthur tomorrow if he found out, as to how he looked like a woman and why the hell was he there anyway? He probably had found out. That could be the only reason he kept looking at Merlin like that. And if he hadn’t, the longer Merlin stayed, the more likely it was that he, or someone else, would recognise him. He had been desperately avoiding Gwen all evening and was praying that she would not recollect the old dress that she had given to Gaius a week ago.

Trying to be as subtle as possible, Merlin slipped away from the table, walking as though he was simply heading to the chamber to get some air. Many ladies stood there gossiping so it was easy for him to slip past them all and head for the exit.

But it was at that moment that someone caught his eye. It was a woman - possibly about middle-aged, with a twisted walk and a jutted chin - darting around a corner, away from the feast. Her hair whipped behind her, straggly and evasive. Merlin’s instincts jumped and so, cautiously, he followed her. But, although she appeared old, she was fast, and she moved with a stealth and a precision that was hard to achieve, and even more hard to shadow. She manoeuvred through crowds with ease, and Merlin, with his heels and his suffocating dress, found it more difficult. She reached a chamber further away from the feast that branched off a corridor that was emptying. People were returning for dessert. No one was here to notice this shifty figure as she slipped inside. Carefully, Merlin crept closer to the door of the chamber and peered in.

This was definitely the sorceress. She was bent over something that Merlin couldn’t see and was whispering words that, although faint, Merlin recognised as chants of the old religion. She sounded rushed and angry. This was not going to end well. He watched her intensely, trying to get a glimpse of what she was preparing.

“What are you doing?”

It took all of Merlin’s self-control not to let out a yelp when these words were whispered with hot breath right into Merlin’s ear. He spun around to find Arthur smirking at him standing right behind him. Too close. Merlin was having a hard time breathing as it was, but now he was choking on the absence of air. He coughed and spluttered. Too loudly, he realised too late.

He heard footsteps coming from the chamber as the sorceress came to the door. Instinctively, he pushed Arthur up against the wall just to the side of the door behind a statue. Arthur’s face appeared like he was about to protest, so Merlin clamped a dainty hand over his big mouth to shut him up. They were both breathing heavily, but Arthur finally seemed to understand the danger of it and fixed Merlin with a worried, questioning scrutiny. Yet again, Merlin tried to hide his face, although he was almost certain that he was too late.

Their faces were dauntingly close, Merlin realised. He could see the flecks of green in Arthur’s deep blue eyes. Their breaths almost seemed to intertwine in the limited space between them. This was too much for Merlin. Why was he feeling this way?

‘Oh don’t kid yourself…’ a voice somewhere in the back of Merlin’s brain muttered. ‘You’ve always felt this way.’

In response, Merlin mentally stuck his tongue out, before realising that there were more pressing matters at hand.

He could still hear the woman at the door, with her wheezing breaths and nervous tapping foot. She stood there for a minute or so more before retiring back into the chamber.

“What’s going on?” Arthur demanded in a harsh whisper, by now thoroughly confused.

“Nothing, your majesty.” Merlin protested quietly. “Why aren’t you at the feast?”

“Why aren’t you?” Arthur returned stubbornly.

Merlin opened then closed his mouth. How was he going to explain his way out of this one? What was more, he still had to try and hide his identity and stop the sorceress! Seriously Gaius, thanks a lot.

“Well?” Arthur persisted.

“Um… Well… You see, your majesty…” Merlin began, but suddenly, he heard the woman’s footsteps again. His voice faded out and he forgot his train of thoughts as his mind focused onto this new dilemma. She was obviously done with what she was doing and might come out at any given moment.

“Yes…” Arthur encouraged, almost teasingly, enjoying watching this strange girl suffer.

The footsteps continued to get louder. If Merlin didn’t shut Arthur up soon then the sorceress was bound to find them, and frankly, Merlin wasn’t too keen on that.

Arthur watched as the girl appeared to be having some kind of internal struggle. He gazed softly into her stunning eyes, strangely familiar and unnerving, yet so comfortably beautiful. At the minute, they told tales of distraught despair lurking behind them, so, carefully, Arthur reached out a hand and placed it gently on the girl’s thin waist.

With a start, Merlin practically jumped as he felt a hand wrap around his waist. He had never realised before just how big Arthur’s hands were, or how perfectly they fit upon his body. It was… really rather nice. And there was still that electricity sparking between them when they touched.

Arthur tried his best to ignore the amazing sensations this simple touch caused throughout him, and instead murmured “Are you ok?”

Merlin’s eyes widened further with fear at the question. He needed Arthur to shut up and be quiet. He needed Arthur to not see the sorceress that was about to come out of that chamber at any minute. He needed Arthur to move away from him and give him some space to think and stop clouding his thoughts with feelings for him.

But sadly, he also needed to hurry the hell up and do something or else they would both be in deep trouble.

“Hello?” Arthur persisted. “Are you alright? You’re not looking too great. Do you need to sit down, perhaps?”

“No, no. I’m fine.” Merlin returned in a strained whisper.

“You still haven’t told me who you are.”

“Neither have you.”

“I didn’t think I needed to.”

“That’s just typical of you, you arrogant prat.”

Merlin’s eyes widened and he bit his tongue. He’d really put his foot in it now. And that sorceress was still coming nearer.

Arthur’s mouth dropped open. No one ever spoke to him like that. Well, except Merlin but he forced himself not to think of Merlin. It was… strangely attractive… not that he’d ever admit that to anyone. Least of all Merlin. Because he definitely wasn’t attracted to Merlin. Nope.

Anyway, why was he thinking about Merlin when there was this beautiful young woman right here that he definitely was attracted to, and could be attracted to because she wasn’t his servant or a man and she definitely wasn’t Merlin. So really he should be thinking about her. Which he was. And the way that she had just offended him really quite bluntly. Which was very attractive.

“You really are something aren’t you?” Arthur whispered, unintentionally leaning closer.

“I’m sorry, your majesty…” Merlin began but Arthur cautiously lifted one finger to shush him.

“Don’t apologise.” Arthur muttered, feeling like he was caught in a daze with the sheer fascination of this human being. “Although I’m glad that you do know who I am.”

“Of course, sire.” Merlin returned, feeling his head cloud with the proximity.

“Sire? No more insults?” Arthur prompted, knowing that he was teasing and that it was improper, but also that he didn’t want to stop.

“I can call you prat if you’d like, my Lord.” Merlin winked, really not sure what he was doing anymore.

“I actually think I would.” Arthur smirked.

“Alright then, you prat.” Merlin laughed under his breath.

However, through the haze surrounding their conversation, he remembered that he was meant to be trying to save Camelot. Couldn’t it wait, he sighed. Just for once, couldn’t he have a normal life? He listened intently, and heard the footsteps of the sorceress right behind them. If either of them uttered a word, they would be found out.

Arthur opened his mouth, trying to think of some witty return. He didn’t want this beautiful stranger to think he actually was an idiotic prat.

Merlin noticed Arthur beginning to speak, and made a split second decision. He grabbed the front of Arthur’s shirt and pulled his mouth against his own.

Both their eyes slid shut. Time seemed to stand still. There were definitely fireworks. And lightning bolts. It was like the ringing truths of destiny’s bells were pealing from all around in muted, joyful fanfares.

Basically, it was absolutely amazing.

Arthur wrapped his arms more firmly around her waist, pulling her thin form against his strong body. Merlin slid his fingers up into the golden locks that he had for so long yearned to touch. There were so many sensations blasting through both of their bodies right now. Their mouths slipped open and their tongues battled for dominance.

Arthur liked the way she put up a good fight.

Slowly, regretfully, they pulled apart. They stayed a minute, wrapped in each other’s embrace, wrapped in the feelings. Arthur dozily brushed a strand of hair back from Merlin’s eyes and Merlin sighed. He took a step back… and bumped into the statue they were meant to be hiding behind… In order to stay away from the sorceress and so save Camelot. But he was also meant to be stopping said sorceress. He whipped his head around. She was nowhere to be seen or heard.

Oh, what had he done?!

Turning back to Arthur, the memories of what had just passed between them returned. He blushed bright red, and began mumbling some excuse. He staggered backwards, falling over the hem of his stupid dress, and tripping again in his stupid heels. Somehow, he managed to turn himself around and start hurrying down the corridor before Arthur fully understood what was going on.

Arthur watched as the girl wobbled about in an adorably clumsy way, before he registered that she was actually leaving him.

“Wait!” he called desperately after her.

“I’ve got to go! I’m sorry!” Merlin shouted back.

“Did I do something wrong?” Arthur asked anxiously.

Merlin paused a second in his escape and turned back around to make eye contact with Arthur. “No, you definitely didn’t do anything wrong.”

Arthur smiled slightly at this consolation. But… “Then why are you leaving?”

“There’s just something I have to do.” Merlin wheeled back around and continued running.

“You haven’t even told me your name!” Arthur protested.

Merlin shrugged enigmatically. “See you later, prat.” He threw over his shoulder, before he dashed around a corner, leaving a very confused, very intrigued, Prince Arthur gaping after him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this was only supposed to be a one shot but I still have at least one more chapter I want to write so please, again, stay tuned :) hope you're enjoying!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took so very long to update... I was hoping to get it done within the day but then I accidentally turned this chapter into a massive long one and dofe happened and so it took a while to finish it. Anyway, thanks for sticking with me and I hope you enjoy!

Merlin sprinted down corridor after corridor – well sprinted to the best of his ability in his attire (it was more like a staggered, swaying jog) – but to no avail. The woman appeared to have simply disappeared. To be honest, Merlin wouldn’t put it past a sorceress to just vanish into thin air. But then Merlin comforted himself by reasoning that she wouldn’t have fulfilled her reason for being there if she did so.

No matter how much he tried, he could not tear his mind away from Arthur and the way that it had felt when he… kissed him.

He still couldn’t quite believe that fact.

And Arthur had kissed him back.

Not that Arthur knew who he was. If he did, he probably wouldn’t have.

But still…

It had been amazing.

‘Focus, Merlin!’ he mentally shouted at himself. He needed to save Camelot and at the moment he was doing a pretty rubbish job.

But Arthur’s lips had been so soft, and his arms had been so strong, and his body had been pressed so tightly against Merlin’s. And it felt so good.

With a jolt, he suddenly realised he had just run past two guards lying passed out on the floor. He was now back to relatively near the banquet hall. Merlin started and rushed up the stairs of the turret that the guards lay at the bottom of. His shoes made a stupidly loud noise on the stones, and so he slipped them off and held them in his hand as he ran.

At the top there was a small chamber which led to a balcony over-looking the banquet hall. The sorceress stood in this chamber holding something in her hand. Merlin slipped silently into the room, cursing the brushing of his dress on the wooden door, and did his best to melt into the shadows… which was a lot more difficult in three layers of silk petticoats than one might consider. He observed as the strange woman muttered more magic, and the thing in her hands glowed. She moved slightly, and Merlin saw it was a vial. Understanding slowly dawned on Merlin, and a plan formulated in his mind.

“Hello?” he whimpered in his falsetto, batting his blue eyes and stepping out of the shadows.

“Who’s there?” the woman whipped around, and seeing it was ‘just an innocent girl’ she visibly relaxed. “Oh hello there dear, are you ok?”

“I got a bit lost, and then I saw you and thought you might help me. How do I get back to the banquet hall?” Merlin continued in his simpering tones.

“You head back down the stairway, deary, and turn left then right.”

“Left then right… I think I’ve got it. Thank you so much!” Merlin gushed. And then paused. “What’s that?” he asked, eyes widening further, indicating the vial that she held.

“Nothing for you to worry about, love.” Merlin could hear the woman getting angry; he would have to speed this up.

“It’s so beautiful!” he exclaimed and, flinging down his heels, he dashed forwards before she could stop him. He grabbed the vial and held it to the light, pretending to examine it.

“Hey! Give that back!” the old crone called.

“I’m afraid I can’t do that.” Merlin smiled gently, gradually dropping the dazed façade.

“You’re going to have to…” the woman threatened and held out her hand as she realised something was up.

“Or what?” he threatened, voice low and calm.

The woman rushed at Merlin, taking him by the throat and slamming him against the wall. Merlin grinned; perfect. Her eyes flashed as though she was about to cast a spell and Merlin prepared himself to end her, when suddenly the door flew open.

“Stop right there!” came the pompous voice of Cabbage McPrat-Bucket, also known as Prince Arthur.

‘Seriously?!’ Merlin internally exclaimed. ‘Could the idiot not keep his prattish head out of one little thing and just let me be?!’

The old woman glared from Merlin to the Prince. “Oh, of course. How sweet.” She crooned. “The knight in shining armour comes to save his damsel in distress.”

Merlin took the woman’s distraction to knee her in the stomach. “I am not in distress. Arthur, get out of here. I’m ok.”

“I can’t just leave you!” Arthur protested, grabbing Merlin and pulling him behind him.

“Arthur, please. I can handle myself! You’re just going to cause me problems!”… like you always do, Merlin mentally added. “She’s a sorceress! She wants to kill your father.”

“Actually,” the sorceress butted in casually as she advanced towards them. “I want to kill him.” And indicated Arthur.

“Even more of a reason for you to get out of here.” Merlin whispered.

“I’m not leaving an innocent lady to fend off a sorceress!” Arthur glared, still shielding Merlin with his body.

“I’m not an innocent lady!” Merlin objected. If only Arthur knew how true that statement was.

“I’m still not leaving.” Arthur said stubbornly.

“Oh good. Now that we’ve got all that sorted out…” the sorceress tapped her foot impatiently as she advanced.

Merlin stepped round Arthur to give him one last imploring stare, but Arthur shook his head.

“Fine.” Merlin sighed. “Have it your way…” And he spun to face the sorceress, simultaneously stepping in front of Arthur. He held the vial up. “You want this?” he taunted. “What does it do?”

“As if I’d just tell you all my plans…” the woman laughed.

Merlin shook the vial experimentally.

“Don’t!” the woman exploded.

“Oh?” Merlin raised an eyebrow.

“It’s dangerous, containing very rare ingredients. Shake it and it will kill us all.”

“And you wanted to use this to kill Arthur here by dropping it on him from over the balcony?” Merlin suggested.

The woman snarled, confirming Merlin’s expectations. “It will work just as well on the King.” And she raised her hand, eyes flashing.

Merlin could feel the vial being pulled from his grasp. But he couldn’t do magic with Arthur right there.

“Leave her alone.” Arthur drew his sword and rushed at the woman.

She chuckled and flipped her hand, casting him aside as readily as if he were a rag doll.

“Arthur!” Merlin screamed.

“I’m fine.” Arthur blushed, already leaping to his feet. “It takes more than that to stop me.”

Merlin could still feel the vial being pulled from him. So, he pretended that the pull of her magic was too strong. Arthur was desperately striking away with his sword, but each time she batted it away, still focusing on pulling the vial towards her. Merlin followed it until he was within reach of her.

“Got you.” She whispered as she lunged for it, but, simultaneously, Merlin raised his leg and kicked her. He grabbed her outstretched arm, pulled it towards him, then twisted it up around her back, as he had learnt from watching Arthur so many times before.

“Not so much of a damsel in distress now.” He snarled in her ear.

“That’s what you think.” The woman declared, and Merlin heard muttered words. He was suddenly blast backwards and found himself crumbling onto the floor.

Arthur growled viciously and took this moment to charge at her and began laying on the attack, assault after assault with his ringing blade. He was making progress, backing her against the wall, but she always managed to evade him. Merlin staggered to his feet, aware that she now held the vial. He watched in horror as she raised it, while still avoiding Arthur’s attacks, as though she were about to plunge it down upon the Prince.

Merlin was powerless. He couldn’t use magic without Arthur seeing, and he didn’t have a weapon. He scrambled around on the floor trying to get up, when his hand closed around something pointed. Glancing down he saw his high heels. He had never been so happy to see the pointy shoes of hell in his life. Without hesitation, he grabbed one and hurled it – with only the smallest, forceful boost of magic – so that it struck her right upon her head.

She staggered, falling backwards into the wooden door that led onto the balcony. With a crash it fell open, her collapsing on top of it, and the merry mirthful sounds of the banquet danced into the room.

Arthur stared from the fallen figure, to Merlin clambering to his feet.

“Are you ok, my lady?” he asked, dashing to his side to assist him up.

“I’m just fine, thank you. And yourself, your majesty?” Merlin returned evenly, already getting sick of how, as a woman, he was treated as though he was about to break at any given moment.

“Fine.” Arthur paused as though he was considering his next words. “But only thanks to you.”

Merlin’s mouth nearly dropped open. He could not be hearing this right. Had Arthur – Prince Arthur – just willingly accepted his own need for the help of others?! He must be dreaming… Actually that would explain a lot. Like the fact that Arthur had kissed him.

Oh god. He could not think of that right now. Not with Arthur so close.

“You know…” Arthur muttered in a light tone. “You are welcome so say something any time now.”

“I’m sorry, sire.” Merlin blushed when his thoughts were broken. “I was just thinking.”

“About?” Arthur prompted, eyes widening.

Merlin paused for a second, and then stuttered “Everything.”

“Nothing in particular?” Arthur’s eyes widened and his hands gently reached out to take Merlin’s.

“You.” Merlin’s voice spoke before his brain gave it permission. Damn. His sense was clouded by Arthur’s proximity.

“And what exactly where you thinking about me?” Arthur’s voice had taken on a flirtatious tone and his fingers were rubbing electrifying circles on Merlin’s smooth palms.

“That you’re a prat.” Merlin muttered.

Arthur smiled his melting half smile. “Anything else?”

“That you’re alright in a fight.” Merlin’s cheeks blushed as he remembered all the fights where he had seen Arthur’s rippling muscles.

“You’re not so bad yourself.” Arthur whispered back.

“I learnt from the best.” Merlin chuckled.

“What else were you thinking about me?” Arthur pressed as he leant closer.

Merlin looked up into Arthur’s big, blue eyes and could not help himself falling. “That I would like to kiss you again.”

He knew he shouldn’t say it but he really couldn’t help himself.

“Your wish is my command.” Arthur murmured as he moved in further and pushed their lips together.

It started off sweet; the soft connection of blissful lip to lip. Arthur’s hand slid up to cup Merlin’s rosy cheek and Merlin couldn’t help but sigh contentedly. Even this was enough to jolt both their hearts to a million miles per minute and whisk away all whisper of worry from their minds. There was nothing – nothing in the world except them, together, here. But slowly, Merlin rose himself up onto tiptoes, pushing their bodies closer together. He tugged at Arthur’s collar and Arthur greedily responded. Without further hesitation, the kiss deepened. Arthur wrapped his arms around Merlin’s thin waist, squeezing him closer still. Their tongues collided and danced their warriors’ celebration, battling over and over, releasing cascades of pure pleasure throughout both their bodies. Arthur slammed Merlin against the wall – not too harshly – but enough to make Merlin groan from his very soul. In response, he bit at Arthur’s lip, making him gasp.

Their kiss was explosive. It was fire and ice, beautiful need and relished desperation for the other’s most divine love and being. It was absolute and all consuming. It was destiny’s perfection.

Eventually, they needed air and pulled apart for a second. They gazed into the others eyes for eternity, entrapping their souls within this immortal moment. Both were breathing heavily, feeling as though they were as light as the wind, burning with an everlasting passion. This was it. This was all they ever wanted. Right here. No more. This. Them. Love.

Suddenly, there came a terrifying, bloody curdling scream from behind them. Both whipped around to find the sorceress awakened from her still state and riled into a fierce frenzy. Her eyes were crazed and her hair was wild and tangled. She had blood trickling down her face and dripping off her haggard chin. She fixed the couple with an unbreakable glare and turned, running out onto the balcony. With a yell, Arthur followed her, reaching for his sword and charging. Without a second thought, Merlin staggered after them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to leave you all on a cliff hanger but I will try and update soon!! Yeh I know that last time it took a while and I am quite busy but I'm trying! I really hope you enjoyed it and stay tuned for more!


	4. Chapter 4

The cheerful sounds of the banquet immediately descended into screams of panic and terror as the sorceress took to the balcony. Arthur instinctively charged forwards, sword swiping, eyes fixed and focused. The sorceress batted away his assaults as though they were pesky flies, although it was clear with every stroke that her defence was weakening. That strike to the head with a high-heel had done her more damage than she dared to let on.

Merlin stood frozen at the edge of the scene. Watching. Transfixed. It so often pained him how easily he could get them all out of difficult situations like this with just the flick of a finger, and yet he couldn’t. However, as he watched, he noticed something glinting within her gnarled and withered grasp. The vial! Merlin wasn’t sure exactly what that vial would do, but while she held it, she still had the upper hand over Arthur. He had to get it.

Merlin darted forward, racing into the fray. He slipped under Arthur’s arm, ignoring his surprised protest, and could feel his hand closing around it. Time seemed to slow down. The sorceress didn’t know what had hit her. The cold, smooth glass was almost within his grasp. He reached for it further, every second seeming like an hour, the tension boiling up in his throat. His fingers tightened, clutching around the big, fat… nothing?

Merlin stumbled forward as everything around him seemed to spin and blur and he felt himself falling into the emptiness before him. With a yelp, he tripped over his own stupid dress and fell upon the floor. Wrenching his body back around, he saw the sorceress reappear in a cloud of smoke, having evidently disappeared from her previous spot in Merlin’s line of attack, like the coward she was.

She registered the disgust on Merlin’s face and laughed tauntingly, toying delicately with the vial. “Why thank you, my dear. I had almost forgotten about that.”

Merlin snarled angrily in return.

“Oh, darling, don’t be like that.” She reproached. “It does no favours for your complexion. Now just sit there and be quiet, like a good damsel, yes?”

“You absolute cockroach!” Arthur roared from behind her as he swung his great sword down.

But the sorceress just raised one hand, and Arthur’s rag doll form followed her motion, slamming into the pillar behind him and hanging there. Arthur struggled against the magical forces holding him, but the sorceress didn’t even bat an eyelid and instead spoke with a quiet so dreadful it rung out clearly over the shrill shrieks from below and the gasping protests of Merlin and Arthur.

“I am so sorry it has come to this.”

Silence descended upon the room.

“I am so sorry that your prince has failed to save his damsel in distress.”

All eyes were upon her.

“I am so sorry that your prince has failed to save you all.”

Stifled gasps rose from the apt audience.

The sorceress raised one arm. The one holding the vial. And held it directly over the edge of the balcony.

People began to scuttle away.

“Don’t move.” The words sounded from her lips and all movement ceased instantaneously. “Is the king here?”

Bravely, Uther stepped forward. “What do you want?”

“I want the end of Camelot.” The sorceress raised one eyebrow.

Arthur shouted out from behind her in a desperate objection, but with a single click, his voice was muffled and he was left silently struggling.

“I’m afraid I can’t give you that.” Uther declared.

“I’m afraid it’s not your choice.” The sorceress giggled.

“I will stop you.” Uther drew his sword.

“There is nothing you can do now. One movement from me, and this room collapses into the fiery pits of hell, and there is nothing you can do to stop it. Your prince has failed; you stand before me at my mercy. There is no one who can stop me now. I would say I’m sorry, but quite honestly, I’m not. Goodbye, your –“

The rest of her words turned to a choking gargle as a sword protruded through her heart and then rose again to slice off her head. Her body crumpled and her grasp grew slack upon the vial. Terror rose in the room once more, as the vial began to fall. However, time seemed to slow down and a pale, dainty hand reached out and plucked the vial from the air, pulling it safely back over the balcony.

Belonging to the hand was a beautiful, angelic face – splattered in blood and sweating though it was – owned by a mysterious woman. In her hand she held Prince Arthur’s sword, and in her other hand she clutched the vial.

“For the last time,” Merlin muttered. “I am _not_ a damsel in distress.”

The crowd gazed up at their anonymous saviour; this stunning, yet strangely familiar, figure standing before them, with hair the colour of coal and eyes the colour of a warm, sunlit sea. And a dress that didn’t quite fit and was quite torn. And no shoes on. And really bad posture for a lady.

“Who are you?” Uther spoke in wonder.

“Trust me, father. I’ve been asking the same question all night.” Came Arthur’s voice from behind Merlin.

Merlin simply laughed enigmatically. “I am just a woman from one of the nearby towns, my lord. I am no one special.”

“You have just saved us all! The kingdom owes you a grave debt, my lady. Please, won’t you tell me your name?” Uther insisted.

Merlin panicked, he hadn’t thought this part of the evening through. To be fair to him, he really hadn’t expected any of it to go this way.

“I’m afraid I can’t my lord.” Merlin stuttered.

“You can’t?” Uther asked in a preposterous tone.

“I must keep my identity a secret.” Merlin fumbled. “I’m not supposed to be here, you see.” Well, that technically wasn’t a lie.

“Of course, my lady.” Uther chuckled. “But you must let us thank you.”

“I need no thanks but the assurance of the safety of my king, my prince and my people.” Merlin spoke, beginning to rather enjoy this status of pompous, mysterious hero. Or heroine, he supposed.

“You are too generous and honest. Camelot needs more citizens like you. I could only desire that we had someone as loyal as you looking after our royals and our kingdom always.” Uther conceded. “At least, you must come down and enjoy the celebrations. The rest of the evening must be held in your honour.”

Merlin smiled graciously. “Thank you, your majesty. I suppose that I can manage that.”

He turned and started back towards the chamber, picking up his shoes on the way. As he began to descend the stairs however, he felt a hand upon his arm.

“My lady.” Arthur’s deep voice spoke from close by Merlin’s ear. “Can you not at least tell _me_ your name? Or something about you? Anything?”

Merlin stopped and looked at the handsome prince. Looked right into his gorgeous eyes like he had otherwise never dared.

“I can’t tell you my name, my lord. But I will tell you something about me.”

“Please do.” Arthur nodded, excitedly.

Merlin took a deep breath. “I… well… I… I think…”

“Yes?” Arthur encouraged.

“I think… I think… I think you’re an absolute prat. I think you’re big headed and arrogant. I think you’re rude and conceited. I think you’re ungrateful for everything everyone does for you.” Merlin stuck his chin up in the air.

“Are you quite done?” Arthur glared angrily.

“I think you’re annoying and insolent and self-centred and stupid and loyal and honest and kind and true and handsome and strong and talented and the best king Camelot will ever have.” Merlin couldn’t help a slight smile slip onto his face.

“Anything else?” Arthur relaxed, grinning too.

“I think I’m in love with you.” Merlin blushed. Somehow this façade gave him a strength he could never have alone.

“Well, I think I’m in love with you too.” Arthur responded steadily.

“Prat.”

“Turnip.”

“Hey! I’m a lady! You can’t call me a turnip!” Merlin protested.

“If I know one thing about you, you’re definitely not a lady.” Arthur smirked.

Merlin’s heart stopped suddenly. Did he know? Oh my, he knew!

“You’re something so much better.” Arthur finished. “You’re a heroine and a saviour and a person that is beautiful on the inside, not just the outside. I love you for who you are, not what you are.”

Merlin nearly melted. Somehow up to now this hadn’t felt real. But hearing Arthur say those words and realising that there was a possibility that Arthur wasn’t in love with Merlin’s girl pretence, but actually with Merlin himself… well, it was overwhelming to say the least.

And that just made everything so much harder when he knew that he would have to go back to… the way things were before. And Arthur would never know. He wondered if Arthur would even remember him tomorrow. Bet you he wouldn’t.

“What’s wrong?” Arthur asked, nervously.

“Nothing.” Merlin stated abruptly, holding back tears. “We should get back to the feast.”

“Was it something I said?” Arthur pushed.

“No. Yes. Sort of.” Merlin sighed.

“What is it?”

“It’s just that you’re a prince and I’m not a princess. At all. And when this night is over…” Merlin trailed off.

“I’m not going to let you go. You’re going to stay here, with me. Forever.”

“Oh please.” Merlin’s voice nearly cracked. “You won’t even remember me in the morning.”

Arthur laughed. “Trust me. I’m never going to forget you.”

“You say that…” Merlin trailed off.

“Look.” Arthur gently took Merlin’s hands. “I promise you I won’t forget you and I honestly want you to stay, if only for a while, before we sort out how things are going to work on a more permanent basis. But for now, if you’ll let me, I’d like to help you enjoy the night – you’ve definitely deserved it – because even if there will be problems in the future, we still have tonight.”

Merlin looked up at him and nodded. “Alright then. Alright then. Alright then, let’s go. Come on, prat.”

“Hey!” Arthur mock-scowled. “What was that for?”

“I guess it was because I love you?” Merlin tried, batting his eyelashes shamelessly.

“Alright then.” Arthur imitated. But instead of calling Merlin a name, he grabbed him and pressed him against his own body, kissing him intensely. When he pulled back, he grinned and breathed a contented sigh.

Merlin, now considerably flushed, glared back at him. “What was that for?”

“I guess it was because I love you.” Arthur returned. And extended his hand to Merlin.

Graciously, Merlin took the outstretched hand and the pair descended down the staircase.

They were nearly at the bottom when Arthur paused and looked at Merlin and said “Did I ever thank you for saving my life and my father’s and my kingdom?”

“No.” Merlin raised his eyebrows. “I told you; you are an arrogant, conceited, ungrateful prat.”

“Is it too late now then?” Arthur asked hopefully, almost looking worried.

Merlin pretended to consider it. Then smiled. “No, of course it’s not.”

Arthur grinned in relief. “Well then thank you very much, my lady, for saving my life, my father’s and my kingdom.”

“You’re very welcome… prat.” Merlin teased. “Now, come on. I want to actually enjoy this night as opposed to being stuck with you in this dingy staircase.”

The couple continued walking, heading back to the banquet. As they went, it could be heard of Prince Arthur that he reckoned he could think of a few ways for them to enjoy the night alone in that dingy staircase. Which was promptly followed by a weak slap from Merlin and a shared smile. Because whatever tomorrow may bring, they still had tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow that was not meant to be that soppy... I am seriously so sorry. Don't worry, however, this is not the end! There will be more coming, probably only one last chapter of the morning after. Thank you so much for reading and I hope you're enjoying!


	5. Chapter 5

The golden sun shone gently into Prince Arthur’s chambers and he blinked his heavy eyelids as his numbed brain awakened. Gradually, the hazy memories of last night drifted back to him, and he smiled contentedly. He let out a small, happy sigh, and stretched out his long limbs to get more comfortable, allowing himself to sink back into his thoughts.

He remembered meeting this girl; this wonderful, mysterious, unique girl with hair the colour of a flitting night and eyes the colour of a babbling brook in the morning light. He remembered her nearly knocking him over. He remembered being entranced by her, staring at her all evening. He remembered following her, talking to her, her calling him a prat. He remembered... he remembered kissing her, her mouth setting his whole body, his whole soul, alive and buzzing with a feeling that he had never experienced before. He remembered her running away, on some sort of strange quest, and he remembered the decision to go after her. And he remembered finding her, with the sorceress, and the way that she fought and the way that she behaved, and the way that she had saved his life, and his father’s life, and had basically saved the day in heroic acts that he could never have imagined could have come from such an innocent, beautiful young lady.

He remembered spending the rest of the evening with her; talking and kissing and dancing and eating. And laughing. He had never laughed that much in his whole life. She was just so sweet and funny and perfect. Her being had a light to it that seemed to shine from her very aura, and it shone so brightly that every light paled in comparison. She could win over an entire room with a single twitch of the lips. She was simply so alive and alight that every person around her could not help but feel the same.

Because, of course, she was indeed truly beautiful, but it was not the shallow, empty beauty that Arthur was so used to experiencing with all the ladies and all the princesses and all the queens that he had ever met. Oh no. Instead, this simple, peasant girl had a full, honest, absolute beauty that came not from her physical form, but from her lithe spirit. He loved her not because of the way that she looked, but because of the way that she was. He loved her simply for her.

But then he remembered saying goodnight to her and setting her up in a bedroom down the corridor, and he remembered the sad look that she had given him as he shut the door after one final kiss. He remembered the way that he had said goodnight, and she had said goodbye.

She didn’t believe that he would still want her in the morning. But he did. He truly did. And he would show it to her. He would go right now and tell her. Then she would have to believe him. He couldn’t wait to see her again. He missed her, and they had only been apart for a few hours.

Carefully, he clambered out of bed, not used to having to get up before Merlin arrived, and pulled on some trousers under his night shirt. He headed out of his chambers, and walked down the empty corridor to the room that he had left her at last night.

Cautiously, he raised his hand to knock and realised it was shaking, although he didn’t quite know whether that was from nerves, excitement, anticipation or desperation. Either way, he gently rapped upon the door and waited.

It dawned on him that she was probably still asleep and he had woken her up. This was a stupid idea. But it was too late now. And he really wanted to see her. He stood there for a few more minutes. He pressed his ear to the door. He couldn’t hear anything. So he knocked again. And stood. And waited. And again. And again.

Eventually, he tried the handle. The door was open. Fear gripped Arthur’s throat. Had something happened to her in the night? Had some opposing evil taken her from him when they realised his feelings for her in order to break him? Had some king so that he would marry their princess daughter instead? Had his own father??

Harshly, he shoved the door open and dashed inside.

The room was empty.

But there was no sign of a struggle. The bed was neatly made, as if it had never even been slept in, and the rest of the room was bare and untouched. A single piece of parchment lay on the table.

After taking once last crestfallen glance around the room, Arthur picked up the paper and read the scrawled note upon it.

‘I’m sorry Arthur’, it read. ‘I’m sorry for the way that I acted last night; it was out of line for someone of my position. I’m sorry that I lead you on, and was not honest with you, and caused you to act in a way that you wouldn’t have done if you had been thinking straight and I had told the truth. I’m sorry that I kissed you, and mistreated you, and put you in danger. I’m sorry that I did not stop and go when I should have done. I’m sorry that I mislead you and was improper with you. But most of all, I’m sorry that I had to leave you without your knowledge that it was a final goodbye, but it was the only way that I could possibly have the strength to do so. I’m sorry that you’ll never see me again, and that you will never know who I really am. I’m sorry, Arthur. I really am. Love.’ And here there was a smudge as though the writer had gone to write their name, but had stopped themselves and instead a single tear had fallen on the ink.

Merlin wiped his eyes to stop the rest of the tears falling as he lay the parchment on the table, took one last sweeping glance around the fancy room, gathered his skirts and his stupid heels, and hurried away down the corridor towards his crumby little chambers where his harsh, wooden bed awaited him. It was difficult to believe he had only left those chambers a few hours ago; it felt like a lifetime had changed since then. But back there he was now headed, to where he belonged, to where he would only ever belong, because Arthur was a prince, and Merlin was a man, and none of this was proper or allowed or even possible. And so Merlin dashed away during the night leaving a very distraught, and very confused, Arthur in the morning.

Dejectedly, the prince headed back to his room, clutching the note in both hands. He stumbled along, nearly tripping, as his whole body seemed to hold a heavier weight than before. He made it to his room and traipsed back to the bed. He sat upon it and stared at the message, reading it again and again, trying to get his head around it, trying to understand.

And somewhere in the background, he registered Merlin’s far too cheery voice saying “Good morning, sire. I see you’re already awake.” It faltered for a second, before going. “Sire? Sire? Are you ok?”

But Arthur did not respond. He did not even look up. Which was probably a good thing, because if he had, he would have seen his own tear tracks reflected upon his manservant’s face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DO NOT WORRY! THIS IS NOT THE END! THERE WILL BE ONE LAST CHAPTER IN WHICH I PROMISE EVERYTHING WILL BE OK! I'm sorry for dragging this out but this chapter turned out so much longer than anticipated and I rather liked it and I just needed to get it out of my creative system so thank you for bearing with and we will get to the end very soon! I'm also sorry for the melancholy mood of this chapter but I felt it was necessary. Thank you so much for reading and I hope you are enjoying!!! Also thank you so much for all the kudos and the wonderful, encouraging comments and feedback <3


	6. Chapter 6

Hurriedly, Merlin wiped away his tears. Arthur could never know the truth. He had to be strong and get through this and everything would go back to normal in the next few days.

But how could he when every time Arthur spoke, he thought about his strong lips upon his own? How could he when every time Arthur moved, he thought about the rippling muscles that had been pressed up against his body? How could he when every time he so much as looked at Arthur, his heart broke just a little bit more?

But Merlin couldn’t help but find some kind of sadistic comfort in the fact that Arthur was obviously upset by the fact that the mysterious lady was gone. Maybe, just maybe, there was still hope?

“Sire?” he asked again.

Arthur finally seemed to jolt back to reality. “What is it, Merlin?” he snapped and Merlin’s heart snapped too.

Of course not. He had been stupid to think that Arthur would ever think of Merlin in any way other than his simple manservant. If Arthur knew who the girl from last night really was, he would be disgusted and appalled.

“Hello?” Arthur pressed. “Earth to Merlin? This is just typical. You bug me, and when I reply, you disappear off to fairyland.” Arthur knew that it wasn’t Merlin’s fault the wonderful girl of his dreams had left and had taken Arthur’s heart with her, but he had never been good at controlling his feelings – especially around Merlin – wait what? – focus! – and no time more so than now.

“Sorry, sire.” Merlin tried to keep his voice steady.

“What was it you wanted?” Arthur spoke, although his heart wasn’t really in it.

“I was just wondering if you were ok.” Merlin asked tentatively.

“Yes. I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?” Arthur returned hurriedly. Was it really that obvious how besotted he was?

“I don’t know, sire. You just look a little down.” Merlin prompted gently.

“Well… That’s just… Maybe… But… It’s none of your business, Merlin. Where’s my breakfast?” Arthur demanded. Perhaps he was just feeling this way because of his growling empty stomach.

“Right here, my lord.” Merlin sighed. Nope. There was no hope at all.

Arthur sat down. It was true indeed that his stomach was rumbling, but for some reason, he didn’t feel hungry. He picked at the bread, but barely ate anything.

Merlin was using all of his self-control not to say something, or do something, that he might later regret. It was just so difficult. So instead he stood in silence, begging that Arthur didn’t do anything else to make his heart break any more.

The silence hung thickly in the air.

Eventually, Arthur pushed his plate away. “Come on, Merlin, where’s the usual mindless nattering that I hate so much?”

Merlin had to cough down a constantly choked sob before he spoke. “I thought you wouldn’t appreciate it today, sire.”

“And why is that?” Arthur demanded angrily. He couldn’t deal with it if Merlin realised how upset he was.

“I don’t know.” Merlin shrugged and fell silent yet again.

He picked up the plate and cleared it away. He pulled the bedclothes up and made the bed. He got Arthur’s clothes out of the cupboard for the day and laid them over the screen.

Suddenly, Arthur cleared his throat. “Where were you last night, Merlin?”

Merlin face reddened and he had to turn away from Arthur to hide this fact. “What do you mean, sire? You dismissed me early because you had the ladies banquet?” Had he figured it out? Did he recognise him? What did this mean? What was Arthur going to do?

“Yes, I know. So where did you go? It’s not that I needed you or anything, I was just wondering.” Arthur continued, trying to make the questions sound off hand and vague.

Merlin’s pulse raced. “I spent most of the evening with Gaius and then I went to the tavern.”

“Which tavern?” Arthur continued.

Merlin’s breathing picked up. He must know. Otherwise he wouldn’t be asking all these questions. “Oh, just the one nearest the castle in the town.”

“Wow, Merlin. How specific.” Arthur sneered.

There was a beat of silence.

“Why?” Merlin asked, palms sweating.

“Oh, it’s just there was someone at the banquet last night who, er, left early and I was just wondering if you bumped into her.” Arthur shrugged, praying that by some unlikely miracle Merlin had seen the girl and knew where she went.

Merlin released a breath he didn’t realise he’d been holding. Arthur didn’t know. It was all ok. He was ok.

Then why did he now feel so let down?

“I’m afraid I saw many women last night. Would you care to specify what she looked like?” Merlin questioned, deciding that he might as well play around a bit while he could.

“Er, well.” Arthur’s face flushed. “She had this long, dark hair. And pale skin. Eyes the lightest blue you will ever see. And she… she had a nice smile. I mean, it was stunning. Everyone thought so. It was… it was a true smile, you know. Like when she smiled, she actually meant it. She was beautiful. Properly. An honest beauty. Pure. Er, yeh.”

Merlin stared, eyes wide. He knew that it wasn’t really him, but… still. He had never been called beautiful. Or have somebody describe him with such… was that really… love? In his eyes?

“Shut up, Merlin.” Arthur glared, when he saw Merlin’s facial expression. “Stop fooling around.”

Merlin tried to rearrange his face back into a normal, functioning face. By Arthur’s raised eyebrow, he guessed it didn’t work.

“I, er, I didn’t say anything.” Merlin tried.

“Whatever.” Arthur grunted.

There was yet another pause. Then, slowly, Merlin spoke.

“She sounds like someone special?” It came out as more of a question. He knew this was a bad idea, whatever this even was, but he just couldn’t help himself.

“She was.” Arthur muttered bluntly. He took a breath. Then: “I don’t suppose you could go and, you know, try and find her?”

Well… Merlin had not seen that coming. “Er…” Merlin gaped.

“What, Merlin?” Arthur narrowed his eyes angrily. He did not need Merlin taunting him.

“Nothing.” Merlin shook himself, trying to recover. “It’s just, er, where did she go?”

“She left.” Arthur grunted.

“I figured out so much.” Merlin teased. “I meant, more specifically?”

Arthur paused. “I have no idea.”

“So you want me to go on a search for a woman with long, dark hair, pale skin, blue eyes and a nice smile, who could be anywhere in the kingdom? Wow.” Merlin raised an eyebrow.

“Just… try. And find her. Would you?” Arthur demanded. Or at least, tried to sound commanding and in control, but failed.

“You really like her, huh?” Merlin’s voice whispered the words before his brain gave him permission.

Arthur simply fixed him with an irritated glare. “Just do it, Merlin.”

“Prat.” Merlin returned without thinking then froze.

Arthur, however, appeared not to even notice. Of course he didn’t. The ignorant fool. Merlin bet he wouldn’t realise the girl was him even if he transformed back into her right before his eyes.

“But… Arthur… Seriously… You haven’t really given me much to go off…” Merlin protested. Not only would his searching be a wasted day, but it would also give other people that were somewhat smarter than Arthur the chance to realise the similarities between the woman Merlin would be going round describing and Merlin himself.

Arthur was still focused on the one word he had heard uttered from his servant’s lips. ‘Prat’. She had called him that. In very much the same way as Merlin had just then. It brought back so many memories. Such as watching her across the banquet hall. And her kissing him up against a corridor wall. And her killing a sorceress and saving them all. Slowly, his thoughts came back around to the situation at hand, just as Merlin was getting impatient.

“Arthur? Arthur? Any more help here? I’m just meant to go around knocking on all the doors of the kingdom describing what is pretty much one quarter of the women and then find the one that left you last night? I don’t suppose she gave you her name? Oh no, that would be far too helpful.” Merlin was rolling his eyes.

Arthur’s brain whirred. Something wasn’t right. “How did you know that?”

“What?” Merlin blinked.

“How did you know that she didn’t give me her name?” Arthur furrowed his eyebrows.

Merlin stalled. “Er.” Oops. He had really messed up. “Well, you haven’t said it yet, so I just assumed...”

Arthur tilted his head and considered this. “Did you… did you read the note or something?”

“What note?” Merlin feigned innocence.

“This one.” Arthur held up the crumpled parchment from its place on his bedside table.

Merlin couldn’t help but feel a slight glow of pleasure when he realised how well read the letter was, judging by the tattered edges. And that there were definitely more tear marks on the page than he had left last night.

“No.” Merlin denied. Then realised he should probably have just said yes. Damn.

Arthur gave him another questioning look, and put the parchment carefully back down. “Ok…” he said, still slightly confused. “Anyway, Merlin, if you don’t do it, then I’ll just have to get the guards to search for her. I could pretend that I think that she’s stolen from me. They’ll definitely find her. There’s no way she could outrun them, unless she’s been running all night. But she has to live somewhere too, right? So they’ll find her. Excellent plan. No need for you, Merlin.” Arthur grinned triumphantly, and started towards the door.

“No!” Merlin broke out and jumped in the way.

Everything Arthur had just said was absolutely true. There was no way that this ‘girl’ could have gotten that far outside of Camelot that the knights couldn’t find her in an instant. And Arthur was bound to realise something was up when he simply couldn’t find her anywhere.

“Merlin? What are you doing?” Arthur questioned, thoroughly confused. “I’m so sorry if I hurt your sensitive pride by discarding you as a searching tool, but…”

“It’s not that.” Merlin protested.

“Then what is it?” Arthur insisted through gritted teeth.

“It’s just… er… maybe… I don’t mean to be… but… Arthur… she ran away… maybe she, er… maybe she did that because she doesn’t want to be found… she doesn’t want to… er… be with you…?” Merlin stuttered, his heart finally fully shattering into a thousand scattered shards.

“No. She… she left because she felt she had to for the sake of the kingdom… Not because she wanted to.” Arthur finished defiantly, trying to ignore the fact that it felt like his very soul was hurting at the mere thought.

“Are you sure?” Merlin prompted, buying for time.

“Yes. Now move out my way.” Arthur pushed past.

“Er! Wait! No!” Merlin grabbed onto his sleeve, before letting go hurriedly. All contact was a reminder of what he couldn’t have.

“What is it, Merlin?” Arthur asked irritably.

“It’s just… Er... Well… I don’t know… Maybe we should…” Merlin blethered.

Anger took over Arthur and before he had realised what he was doing, he had grabbed Merlin by the front of the shirt and pulled him right up close to his face.

“Merlin, if you do not shut up and get out of my way and let me go after the person I love, I swear to the Gods that I will…” He broke off when Merlin’s jaw dropped and his eyes widened. “What?” Merlin never usually cared about his threats.

“You…” Merlin’s voice broke as he breathed out the words. “You love m… er, her?”

“What?” Arthur asked, thoroughly confused. At first, it had sounded like… never mind.

They both just stopped and stared at each other. Merlin couldn’t help but feel déjà vu from this proximity. He tried to stop himself thinking about it, knowing that he really couldn’t, but he also could not help himself. And he also could not help fixating on the words that had just been uttered from the prince’s mouth. It was just like there was a new found flicker of electricity between them, which was not helped by Arthur’s strong form and handsome face being so very close to Merlin’s.

Arthur felt… weird. There was… something… like a spark… between him and his manservant. It was very familiar… almost like… But it couldn’t be. Because Arthur wasn’t in love with Merlin. But still. His beautiful, big, blue eyes blinking so close to his own did not help at all. In fact, those eyes held something that he almost… recognised? In a way more than just…

Merlin coughed and stepped away. Automatically, Arthur’s hand gripped his waist to stop him.

There it was again. A lightning bolt shooting between them.

Arthur blinked, confused. What was going on? He removed his hand.

Merlin coughed again. “So. You love her?”

Arthur glared. “It’s none of your business.”

Merlin raised an eyebrow trying to hide his laughter. He had no idea how wrong that was. But “You’ve only known her one night!”

“And yet it feels like I’ve known her for years. We… understand each other. We get along. How could I not love her?”

Merlin felt like he was melting. It took all of his strength just to stay upright. And yet, it wasn’t him that Arthur was talking about. It was the girl form of himself – the beautiful, seductive girl form. Arthur wouldn’t give a second glance at the real, ugly, clumsy monstrosity that was the boy form.

“She does indeed sound beautiful.” Merlin sighed, resigned.

Arthur took a breath and gave in to the torrent of words that were desperate to escape. “Yes.” He shrugged. “Yes I guess she is absolutely beautiful.” Merlin’s heart sunk. “But that’s not why I love her.” Merlin looked back up from underneath his eyelashes. “I love her because… I love her because she’s… funny. And smart. With witty comebacks. She’s… unique. She insults me. And isn’t afraid of me. She treats me like a normal person and to hell with being proper. She’s clumsy and adorable and genuine. And she has… strength… to her. She’s not scared of the normal things that people are scared off. Like crazy sorceresses or meeting the prince or… kissing the prince. She doesn’t mind taking the lead and she doesn’t care about the consequences. She’s fun and light hearted and free. But she’s also serious… there’s something to her that holds a weight beyond her years and beyond her mind; I can just feel it. And it makes me so in awe of her. And yet she’s still so happy and alive. And also, she can actually fight and, when she does, she has a fire in her that burns so brightly I could swear that she is glowing. I mean, she knocked out a sorceress with a shoe. I’ve never heard of anyone do that, let alone a young peasant. And… well… she saved my life. And my father’s. And the kingdom. And for some reason I find that incredibly beautiful – that and just the way that she is – more so than any physical feature. So yes, Merlin. I guess I do love her.”

Arthur finished speaking and an absolute silence descended upon the room.

“Arthur…” Merlin breathed without thinking. “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, ok I'm sorry! I really need to just finish this! But this chapter turned into a really, really long one and I wrote a short ending to it when I realised how ridiculously long it was, but then I decided that I hated that ending and that it was shit and if I've made you all trek through such a long fanfic, I had better at least give it a bloody good ending. So give me a little while longer, but I thought that I had better give you something to fill the time. Also, sorry about the cliffhanger (again) ;)


	7. Chapter 7

There was a shocked silence where Merlin slowly realised what he had just said.

He spluttered and continued. “I mean, I’m sure she loves you too. Wherever – whoever – she may be. I mean, how could she not? When the charmingly handsome prince of Camelot takes an interest in you like that, and thinks of you like that, then I reckon it’s pretty much impossible not to fall in love with him back…”

“Merlin…” Arthur’s voice was laced with confused confrontation.

“Yes Arthur?” Merlin’s attitude pleaded innocence but the look in his eyes told otherwise.

“What did you just say?” Arthur’s tone was almost challenging.

“That I’m sure she loves you too?” Merlin replied, although it came out as more of a question.

“Before that.”

“I didn’t say anything?” Merlin’s heart was racing. What had he done? He had royally messed up this time…

“Yes you did Merlin.” Arthur refused to back down. He knew what he had heard. “You said ‘I love you too’.”

“No I didn’t.” Merlin protested, although he felt there was barely any point. “I said, she loves you too.”

“Merlin…” Arthur sighed. “Come on. Do you take me for a fool?”

Internally, Merlin almost laughed all things considered. Externally, he simply shook his head, resigned.

“So, do you want to explain yourself now?” Arthur raised an eyebrow.

For some reason, Arthur could feel his heart beat picking up; his breathing was already quick and shallow, and his eyes were open wide. Was he nervous? No. This was just Merlin we were talking about here. But he couldn’t be… excited? I mean, those couldn’t be butterflies in his stomach right now? Because this was just Merlin? Right?

Merlin felt as though he had been backed into an inescapable corner. He couldn’t deny what he said, and if he didn’t explain everything from the previous night, then Arthur would never even give him a second glance. At the same time, could he really just tell Arthur that the wonderful, mysterious girl he thought that he was in love with was actually only him?

“Merlin? I’m waiting.” Arthur demanded, trying to stop his voice from shaking… which ended up making him sound cold and rude. Drat.

“I’m sorry, sire. I don’t know how to say this.” Merlin stammered. He hadn’t been this afraid of Arthur since they had first met. And to be honest, he hadn’t even really been afraid of him then. So this was probably the most afraid of Arthur he had ever been. Focus Merlin.

Arthur raised a single eyebrow, attempting a nonchalant, couldn’t-care-less attitude, but inside, he felt like the fluttering in his stomach was going to make him take off into the air.

Merlin took a deep breath, decided. One look at Arthur’s face made him realise how far he had fallen, and how he could not bear it if Arthur never understood what had happened and instead simply dismissed Merlin as his manservant because of his awkward, disgusting feelings. “I’m sorry I wasn’t honest with you, Arthur. I should have been, right from the beginning. But I want you to know, I didn’t plan any of this; it wasn’t my fault that you bumped into me and well things escalated.” He knew he was rambling but he couldn’t stop himself.

“Merlin… What on Earth are you talking about?” Arthur’s voice shook and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

“Last night…” Merlin sighed. “The girl that you met, or thought that you met…” He couldn’t say it. He couldn’t look Arthur in the eyes and watch his soul being crushed when he understood.

“What about her?” Arthur commanded.

“She…” Merlin looked down at the floor. “She was me.”

There was silence. A stillness stuck in the air so absolute that not even the dust moved. Everything froze.

“What…” Arthur’s voice broke halfway through and he tried again. “What do you mean? I don’t understand.”

Merlin continued to look at the floor. “Gaius heard that there was a sorceress who was planning to attack Camelot last night at the ladies’ banquet. It would be the perfect cover, I guess, and all the men would be out the way. And so, he… he, er, managed to, er, procure a potion… from somewhere or someone or something… that would turn me into a girl. The same girl that you, er, met last night.”

For once, the prince was so dumbfounded that he lost the words to speak. Instead, he slowly shook his head. “No. I would have realised. I would have recognised you even with your cover.” He insisted. He knew that he was being rude – he could see the hurt on Merlin’s face – but he could also feel the frantic nerves and frenetic butterflies dancing throughout his body increasing, and that terrified him.

“Think about it, Arthur.” Merlin urged gently. “Think about the girl.”

Arthur thought about her. The girl. The girl with the raven black hair and the sky blue eyes and the porcelain skin. The girl with the teasing and the taunting and the hiding. The girl who could fight like Arthur himself had taught her. The girl who called him prat. The girl with no name.

And then he thought about Merlin. Merlin had raven black hair and sky blue eyes and porcelain skin. Merlin teased him and taunted him. Arthur _had_ taught Merlin to fight. Merlin called him prat. The girl was… Merlin? But no.

“That doesn’t prove anything.” Arthur insisted. “About a quarter of the kingdom has black hair and blue eyes and pale skin; you said so yourself.”

“Arthur… It was me… I can prove it.” Merlin sighed.

“How?” Arthur demanded.

“You and the girl first met when you bumped into her in the corridor outside the banquet hall and it made you both late. How would I know that if I hadn’t been there?” It hurt Merlin’s, already damaged heart, to do this, but there was no going back now.

“You could have seen that from around the corner.” Arthur countered.

Merlin nearly made some jape about how he didn’t spend his life lurking around corners stalking Arthur’s every move, but somehow he felt that he didn’t really have a leg to stand on right now. “Fine. How about when you followed me into a corridor where I was spying on the sorceress and I pretended not to know who you were and I called you prat and… I…” Merlin broke off, unsure if Arthur wanted to relive that memory with the knowledge he now knew.

“You’re lying.” Arthur growled, advancing on Merlin with anger (concealing fear… and something else entirely) in his eyes.

“Am I?” Merlin backed away from Arthur, but he held his ground in the argument. “How about later when you had to come and get in the way – you know, I was perfectly fine handling that sorceress before you came along – and so I had to resort to knocking the damn witch out with a shoe and saved your royal behind in the process. But then we, er, got, er, distracted… and she went full on crazy and we had to battle her on the balcony overlooking the banquet hall and she had you trapped and was about to drop the vial on your dear father and ruin all of Camelot. But then I stepped in and killed the sorceress with your own sword and the rest of the night was held in my honour, and we danced all night and… and kissed all night. But then I had to leave and I just left that note over there and I never even told you my name.”

Arthur had backed Merlin right up into a wall. “How do you know all this?” he challenged.

“I promise you, Arthur. I’m telling the truth.” Merlin implored.

“Prove it!” Arthur ordered.

“I just did!” Merlin exclaimed. “Please, Arthur. You’ve got to believe me.” he begged.

“No… No…” Arthur refused. He could not accept this. But not for the reason that he was trying to make himself believe. Arthur pressed Merlin further into the wall. “Prove. It.”

“What do you mean?” Merlin blinked, unwilling to let himself hope, and even consider that Arthur could possibly be asking him to do what he thought he might be asking him to do.

“Last night, _Mer_ lin. You said it yourself. We… if it was even you… kissed. And I felt things that I’ve never felt before and I highly doubt that I will ever feel again. So go on, _Mer_ lin. Prove it.” Arthur practically spat the words, and tried to force his bamboozled mind that he was only doing this because he was sure that Merlin was wrong.

“Are you sure, Arthur?” Merlin stared, surprised.

Arthur rolled his eyes, and simply grabbed Merlin’s shoulders and pulled his lips against his own.

And the second they touched, the world explored. Colours flashed everywhere like some sort of exploding, multi-coloured fire in the night sky. Fountains poured burning, molten gold through every vein in their bodies. And everywhere they were touching – their mouths, their chests, Arthur’s hands on Merlin’s shoulders – felt like it was numb from the pure clashing, contrasting, electrifying feelings that were pulsing between them.

Arthur was acting without consent from his brain, which appeared to have simply gone completely blank. But his body was ringing with nerves up and dancing to the driving rhythm of his racing heart. This was amazing. He needed more. He pulled Merlin closer without thinking.

It felt alive. It felt phenomenal. It felt… exactly like last night. If not better.

And suddenly Arthur pulled away. Both of them blinking when they realised that the time that had passed had actually only been a couple of seconds, although it felt like a lifetime ago.

Arthur stared. He had to accept it now. There was no denying that Merlin was the girl. He looked at Merlin: he looked at his bright, wide, sky blue eyes; he looked at his flushed, rosy cheeks over porcelain skin; he looked at his tousled raven black hair;… he looked at his cheeky, delightful lips that so often held the most beautiful, stunning smile in the world. Those same cheeky, delightful lips that were currently turned into a worried frown.

“Arthur?” Merlin asked, gently. He was terrified. He could tell Arthur believed him now. But still. What did this mean?

“Merlin…” Arthur breathed. Then paused. “So it was you.”

“Yes.” Merlin sighed, and almost looked dejected. “And I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” Arthur questioned, confused. “For what?”

“For not telling you? For lying to you? For making you believe that there was a girl that you were in love with who doesn’t really exist?” Merlin almost had to blink back tears.

Arthur considered this. It was true. Shouldn’t he be feeling broken? Shouldn’t he be devastated that his dream girl didn’t exist? Shouldn’t he be running as far away from his stupid manservant as possible right now?

He looked at Merlin again.

But of course not. Because his dream girl did exist. And she was right here. Only she was not a girl.

She was his stupid manservant.

And he hadn’t needed that kiss to realise that. He figured he had always known, somewhere, deep, deep down. He had just needed that kiss to allow himself to realise that. Because he had always liked Merlin. Always. He had just never let himself believe it could be possible. Until now.

“Merlin.” Arthur spoke again, his voice gently determined. “You have nothing to be sorry about. It wasn’t your fault. And really, you’ve done us both a favour.”

Merlin looked like he was about to interrupt, so Arthur simply raised a finger to his lips – which made them both smile slightly, reminiscent of last night.

“You seem to think that I only loved the girl from yesterday. But, Merlin, what you don’t seem to understand is that I only loved her because she was you. You heard me earlier: it wasn’t because of the way that you looked, it was because of the way that you were… are. Everything that I loved about her is something that I love about you. And I always have, Merlin. And I always will.”

Merlin felt like he was melting. “I love you too, Arthur.”

“Yes…” Arthur smirked, teasingly. “I think you mentioned that already.”

“Yeah, well.” Merlin taunted right back. “Sometimes I have to say things twice for you to fully understand them. You can be a bit… slow, sometimes.”

“I’ll have you know I’m the Prince of Camelot.” Arthur acted shocked, although he was grinning flirtatiously.

“I’ll have you know you’re a prat.” Merlin returned evenly, with a twinkle in his eye.

“Hey, I’ll get you for that!” Arthur exclaimed and started after Merlin.

Merlin squealed and dashed around the room, Arthur in hot pursuit. However, he made the bad decision of running past the bed, where Arthur managed to intercept him, and tackle him onto it.

They looked into each other’s eyes, both breathing heavily, both of their hearts racing.

And neither of them was sure who started it, but their lips touched once again and each time it was as magical and as exhilarating as the last. Arthur’s arms raised themselves up and wrapped around Merlin’s waist pulling him closer. He tilted his head, deepening the kiss, and Merlin was only too happy to respond. Their tongues touched, and it was like fire and ice, meeting in a passionate explosion of all the sexual tension from the past few years finally being fully realised by both parties. They fought for dominance, and naturally Arthur won, but Merlin got his own back by grabbing Arthur’s butt. Merlin felt Arthur raise an eyebrow as though accepting this challenge, and all of a sudden Merlin felt himself being flipped over onto his back so Arthur was hovering above him, assaulting his neck with his teeth. Merlin gasped. Arthur chuckled into the kiss, sending the most delightful vibrations throughout Merlin’s whole body.

“Merlin?” Arthur asked eventually after they had relaxed into an almost snuggling position on his huge, luxurious bed, simply playing with each other’s lips as though they had all the time in the world.

Merlin sighed, knowing that this would inevitably come. There were so many questions and Merlin wasn’t even sure he had an answer for half of them. Arthur opened his mouth, a confused look upon his perfect features. Merlin braced himself for the inevitable interrogation. But then “Where on Earth did you get that dress?”

Merlin blinked. Then met Arthur’s amused gaze and simultaneously they fell about laughing.

“If you really want to know, it used to be Gwen’s.” Merlin managed to get out in between giggles.

“It suits you.” Arthur teased. “You’ll have to wear it again sometime. Just for me.” he kissed Merlin again.

Merlin obliged and felt himself falling into the bliss that was Arthur’s being. But just as the kiss began to deepen once again, Merlin pushed Arthur back just for a second.

“That’s really it? That’s all you want to ask?” Merlin pressed.

“I have many questions,” Arthur acknowledged. “Which you will have to answer in due course. But right now…” he pressed a gentle kiss to Merlin’s neck. “I am more than happy…” Another kiss, slightly higher up his neck. “To ignore them all.” Another kiss. Before pulling away to look Merlin in the eyes.

“I have one.” Merlin sighed. He couldn’t believe he was really doing this. “What does this mean? I mean, for us?”

“It means I’m pretty sure we’re both in love with each other, and I would like you to be mine. Does that satisfy you?” Arthur smiled reassuringly.

“You do realise that you’re the Prince of Camelot and I’m just a servant, and also a man?” Merlin teased him, but there was a serious note hovering underneath.

“Oh what? Really? I must have missed something! I thought you were a mysterious, heroic girl!” Arthur taunted right back. “But yes, I do.” He added, voice becoming more serious. “But I also meant it when I said forever, Merlin. I’m not going to let you go. Ok?”

“Ok.” Merlin grinned his breath-taking, room-lightening, stunningly true smile that Arthur loved so much. But just as he leant in to kiss Merlin some more, he heard him add “You prat.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tis done! Thank you so much for reading and I really hope you enjoyed it! I apologise for the soppy ending but I just couldn't help myself; Merthur is just too adorable! Thank you also so much for all the wonderful encouraging kudos and the absolutely lovely comments - you are all amazing people and it means so much - thank you <3 There may be more Merthur coming up so stay tuned, and also I am currently obsessed with Once Upon A Time (CaptainSwan for the win) so be prepared for the possibility of some of that. Again, thank you so much for reading, and I bid you all a fond farewell for now.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin (if I did then there would have been a hell of a lot more Merthur). Hope you all enjoyed, thanks for reading - next chapters coming very soon, I promise, so stay tuned. Merthur prompts are very welcome. This is for my ever fabulous DreamCatcher as an end of exams (and belated birthday) gift!


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